Saturday, August 21, 2010

"Gary's Incredible Journey"

So I saw the cover of the Winnipeg Free Press on Friday. There was a huge article titled Gary Doer's Incredible Journey. Or something to that effect. Not that I would pay for any copy of the Winnipeg Free Press. Do paying members of the NDP get a free subscription? You'd think they would, considering it has become the NDP's party newsletter.

Anyways, no, what I do instead is imagine my own better storyline, possibly based on old Disney movies. Gary Doer was left behind by his family at, oh, lets say, Wapusk National Park (where they were doing photo ops). Gary, the two family dogs, and cat, had to travel kilometers of wilderness to reach the family home in Winnipeg. Now, obviously the cat was the sensible one, and the older dog was the leader, wheras Gary and the younger dog were rambunctious troublemakers and Gary got his snout full of porcupine quills during one unfortunate incident. Oh what an amusing event. In any case, they made it back home to Winnipeg only to realize, oh right, Washington D.C. Gary Doer is voiced by Gilbert Gottfried. Why not.

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