Sunday, November 25, 2007

Toronto Maple Leafs 2-Ply Tissues from Dollarama

Dollarama is a great store. Aside from Furniture and Clothing, you could go to Dollarama and get almost everything you'd ever need, for the price of ONE DOLLAR.

Now, I hate the Toronto Maple Leafs, like all intelligent Canadians. So I was surprised when I came across a package of "Toronto Maple Leafs 2x16 2-Ply Tissues" at the dollarama. Basically a package contains 2 little tissue packs. Now, why would I buy this if I hate the leafs?

Heres the thing. I only saw Toronto Maple Leafs brand tissues. No Phoenix Coyotes brand tissues (they beat the Leafs tonight, the lowly Coyotes) No Edmonton Oilers or Montreal Canadiens tissues. Just the Leafs.

Does that make sense? Yes. Yes it does. Leafs fans are idiots, and furthermore they are idiots who will buy anything with the leafs logo (and some say are to blame for Canada's flag being the maple leaf. Heck they wanted it to be blue) .. Also, Leafs fans are the sports fans with the most reason to cry of any sports fans out there.

So, the point of this post was to mock Maple Leafs fans. Yes, I'll kick you when you're down you're that annoying. The only fans that came mildly close to being as annoying and deluded as Leafs fans are fans of England at the euro/world cups (Soccer, or as its know there, Football). They lost to the superior team a couple days back, to Croatia, and couldn't believe it, made tons of excuses, are out of Euro 2008, have to play Croatia AGAIN for the 2010 World Cup as they are in the same division, and STILL think "OH yeah we can beat them EASILY".. NO YOU CAN'T! YOU SUCK! DONT YOU GET IT? They just don't.

In any case, this guy makes a good point at this link here as to why the Leafs are garbage.

Alas, I'll end this with the CFL where the Winnipeg Blue Bombers lost in the Grey Cup to those evil sons of lucifer themselves, the Saskatchewan Roughriders. Too many injuries destroyed the Bombers chances. It just wasn't to be. I'm actually amazed they made it to the Grey Cup game at all this year. Hopefully they can pull it together, and win it next year. I'll give the Bombers credit for exceeding my expectations, and then meeting them in the Grey Cup. Congratulations to Saskatchewan. I guess we'll have to get a conservative provincial government too, then we'll win. In Fact, I blame Gary Doer for losing the coin toss. Jackass. Increasing the minimum wage is dumb too. It just means more people will be making minimum wage. Why penalise hard workers? Oh right, I forgot. This is the NDP we're talking about.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Holywood Writers Strike

If you haven't heard by now, Hollywood Writers are going on strike. They want more money from internet sales, but they aint gettin it. So strike it is! Now, I know people come here for the news, so, this is how you'll be affected:

- Immediately: Late-night talk shows, which depend on topical material, will go to reruns

- In about one month: Daytime soap operas will go to reruns

- By January-February: Current prime-time shows will likely run out of fresh episodes

- Reality shows unaffected; Fox, with fewer hours to program and powerhouse "American Idol" returning in January, in best shape if strike continues, according to The Hollywood Reporter

- ABC has stockpiled several new shows, could put them on in midseason if strike persists

- TV networks have stockpiled TV movies

- Movie studios in decent shape for now

- By July: Military Juntas roam the streets rounding up anyone who has discovered the outside world

- By September-October: Mass Canibalism, some Zombie skirmishes.

- By November: Lindsay Lohan runs out of crack and heroin, online gossip sites beg washington for financial aid. Saturday Night Live wins an emmy for its best season ever, despite having produced no episodes.

- By December 2008: Thermo-Nuclear war. Dogs and Cats living together.

Clearly its no laughing matter. A world without poorly written hollywood television is one too frightening to imagine. People might resort to watching the BBC or Canadian Television or cancelling their Cable TV subscriptions because now there really IS nothing to watch.

Still, I'm pretty sure most cartoons are unaffected by this, so Simpsons, Family Guy, South Park, and all the rest of the shows that I watch will continue as if none of this mattered. Which it doesn't. Well, except for The Colbert Report. Maybe Colbert will use the free time to run as an independant candidate in the election. Though why anyone would want to follow George W Bush into the presidency and try to fix his mess is beyond me. Even if you win, you lose.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Worst Halloween Candy ever!

What is the worst halloween candy ever?

I remember in my youth there were some pretty crappy candy's given out. Stuff that tasted like blue soap, which is not an actual flavour that should exist, but does. I never cared for popeye cigarettes, and leaving aside utter crap like Candy Apples and popcorn in a bag (seriously.. ), the worst candy ever is this:

god I hate these candies. I bought some this year to give out to kids who are annoying looking, but there were barely any trick or treaters this year. It was actually quite dissapointing, though I have a lot of leftover chips/various treats left over for myself to munch on. It's quite dissapointing.

Anyways these candies are some sort of maple caramels made by some quebec company called bonbon something or other.. they used to be given out all the time, luckily people dont give them out anymore it appears. then again, im not going trick or treating so how would I know, but I assume by what they sell at the store they don't give these out.

I would have liked to have handed out sunflower seeds, but the only company selling sunflower seeds in tiny halloween packages was 'spitz' and they were only the seasoned kind, which i hate. salted is how i like my sunflower seeds and thats it. I wont risk having crappy leftover treats I wont eat. Still it was a step up from last year when you couldnt find anyone selling sunflower seeds. What is it with that? They used to give them out all the time around here. Nutty Club sunflower seeds, or that other brand that uses the silver foil wrappers.. whatever.

Another thing they gave out when I was younger were packs of trading cards with the gum stick in them. Those were great, because I'd amass a huge collection of those cards and had perfect card house building material. (blue/yellow cards looked better than regular playing cards) I still have them somewhere. Even Back to the Future trading cards. Good times.

I suppose it all comes down to overprotective interest groups ruining things for kids by not allowing "advertising" to "warp" kids minds. Now Saturday morning cartoons are almost a distant memory, partly because of the fact that there are a billion channels now, but also because of the fact that they first wouldn't let them sell toys for the same products within a certain time frame of something being aired, then McDonalds wasn't allowed to advertise, and now breakfast cereals! It's disgusting, and kids today will grow up without the same sense of humour as I did about the whole thing. They may even end up more susceptible to advertising in the end, not being trained at an early age to weed out the crap toys from the ones that were actually good. And it's not like kids are stupid. They know Transformers are better than GI Joe. Not that GI Joe was bad, but if you had a choice of Megatron vs Sargent Slaughter, you'd fucking take Megatron. Except todays transformers are 100% cheap plastic. And if you wanted a Megatron toy, he wouldn't be a gun, cause you can't give children weapons! That'l make them violent! As if.

Regardless of my whole rant, those orange candies are disgusting. Though they don't make me throw up. Oh yeah, one last rant. Tootsie rolls. You know those coloured ones? Why do they make so many blue and red coloured ones, but not yellow and orange like I like ?? It's like black jujubes. NOBODY LIKES THEM, so why do they make them? It makes no sense! And it always seems like in a mix of candy, the kind you like is the least likely to be there.